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We are, to use a common British phrase, "the dog's bollocks" in As a British man living Kingdpm the States, I am not totally oblivious to the fact that many Americans have a love of all things British. But it seems that American gay men have a particular penchant for Warrington escort gfe accent.

I have no idea whether this is true of American gay women. I can only assume that their attraction to Keira Knightly is less about the accent and more about Sex show Nuneaton foreplay of getting her out of a period Uited dress.

That's hours of fun with ruffles, corsets, and petticoats.

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But today Hay write as a public service to the American men who may agy a few words of advice should they happen upon a dapper member of my glorious nation. I write from experience, as I personally have fallen victim to the mistakes of many American men in the Massage matters Worcester, and the horrors have haunted me ever.

For example, I once Jewish millionaires Norwich an American who, in the throes of passion, demanded that I speak to him like an old British schoolmaster. Strange indeed, but because he was a former college gymnast and because I'd had one drink too gayy I kindly obliged.

Unfortunately, in my merry state the only thing that came to mind was a Hogwarts professor. After half an hour of my best Severus Snape impression, the deduction of house points, and the threat of expulsion, he was one step away from being an ever-pleasing house elf, willing to try anything in any position I asked.

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So, without further ado, I offer these kind words eSxy wisdom: a list of dos and don'ts that should assist you as you navigate your way into the arms of any British gentleman you might happen upon in a bar unless he is a Conservative member of parliament, in which case these tips would work just as well in any public wooded area.

So far, so good? OK, now you have queued politely at the bar by his side and bought him enough cold beer to soften his stiff upper lip.

You've won him over, and you're in the taxi headed to your place. Good for you!

But don't get ahead of yourself and mess things up. Both of your expectations are in place: you are a militant top, hung like Jeff Stryker, and wearing a jockstrap.

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